Emotional evening - seconding is hard!

This evening, I went with my friend who had the accident back up to the quarry to climb a route next door to the one where he fell back in May.  For me as belayer, being the first time since the accident to belay him, it was a hugely emotional and terrifying experience.  I could feel the tension mounting in my body as I experienced a huge wave of negative thoughts and flashbacks to a few months ago.  I didnt want to transmit this up the rope, so focused on breathing calmly so I could talk calmly to John in case he needed the support too.

Relieved that he topped out without incident, I thought I could relax an breeze on up the climb, one I have done a few times before.  However, I totally underestimated the effect of holding that tension whilst belaying on my ability to second.  I pretty much dragged myself up the route, my body feeling clumsy, tight and awkward, and found myself still feeling the effects of the adrenalin from belaying.

I think its important to raise this as I know many of you will be belaying either nervous partners or people who are climbing at their limit, and this vicarious tension can have a huge effect on your own performance, whether seconding or when it comes to your turn to lead.  As a belayer, you may need to use the anxiety management techniques as much as when leading!

Well done John for a composed lead, and I am glad that the 'first time' since the accident for us to climb together passed without event, making the next time easier :)